The Puma, Puma concolor, is a critically endangered species, last seen in the parking lot of Mile High Stadium in Denver, Colorado.
Originally thought to inhabit Democratic circles, further research has shown that they are actually more at home with Republicans, Fox News, and generally retarded homo sapien sapiens.
Most Pumas travel in packs, most likely attracted to each other by scent, possibly related to menstrual flow. Other theories about packing include safety in numbers, permitting them to accumulate their single digit IQ's into larger numbers; and the need to appear larger than they actually are, in order to attract another related species, Fox News Reporter.
If you encounter a Puma, you are warned not to approach, as they can be erratic and very noisy. They are easily intimated, however, by peppering them with questions asking them to cite wacky research.
There have been several attempts to save the species by encouraging them to mate with their closest cousin, the Zell Miller. However the Zell Miller does not have testicles, so mating never occurs.
You can save the Puma by supporting tag and release and captivity programs. Straight jackets are optional. Sphere: Related Content
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