Glenn Beck Kills Three Police Officers in Pittsburgh

For years the mantra has been that guns don't kill people, people kill people. Whenever some nut goes out and kills a bunch of people with a gun, we find some other reason to blame, other than the fact that the lunatic had a gun in the first place.

In 1999, when Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold shot 36 people and then themselves at Columbine High School, it wasn't the fact that two obviously disturbed boys managed to get their hands on a small arsenal. It was that they were listening to dangerous music, like the Insane Clown Posse and Marylin Manson. The theory went that the music, filled with violent imagery, led the boys to commit murder. Seems reasonable to us. At least it wasn't the guns.

When Michael Moore interviewed the former president of the National Rifle Association, Charlton Heston in Bowling for Columbine, the subject of gun violence arose. When Heston was asked what the reason for the high incidence of gun violence in this country was, compared to another country with just as many guns per capita like Canada, Heston, thought for a demented moment, and blamed the colored folk. At least he didn't blame the easy access to guns.

And this past week, when an immigrant, upset over losing his job to outsourcing--please insert irony here--walked into an immigration support agency--insert sad irony here--and opened fire and killed 13 people before pulling the gun on himself, the blogosphere was quick to point out that Jiverly Voong was a Vietnamese immigrant. The story suddenly went from massacre in New York State, to immigrant kills people. Sounds better than blaming the right to have guns, lots and lots of guns. My bottom hurts just thinking about it.

Not being one to blame the innocent guns, I believe that we must continue this proud tradition of placing blame anywhere but with the guns, those sweet, innocent guns. This past week, when an unstable man, who feared that Barack Obama was going to take away his guns, opened fire on police in a quiet street in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, it wasn't his adorable little guns who killed three police officers. It was those messages, which told him that President Obama was going to take away his guns.

Since these messages had to originate somewhere, and since the célèbre du jour is that rising star over at Fox News and Howard Beale impressionist, Glenn Beck, it seems appropriate to hang the blame on him.

So my next question is, when will the Pennsylvania State Police issue an arrest warrent for Glenn Beck? And if they aren't going to arrest the man, will there be a civil suit, where the widows of the slain police officers get to sue his and Rupert Murdoch's asses off? And even if there is no suit, will he be so destroyed by the event, that his show eventually gets ripped off the air like Jenny Jones?

It seems appropriate, and makes about as much sense as blaming some cross dresser or rap singers who like to wear clown makeup for Columbine, black people for gun violence, or immigration for a massacre.

Because if we start examining who can purchase a gun in this country, where will that lead? Pretty soon some nuts out there in the blogosphere will actually question things like if immigrants and green card holders can get guns. And that would be just sad.

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